featured painting is by Alison Saar

May 12, 2025 

Our parents are human

They are adults who were once babies, toddlers, teenagers, and young adults

We are all tall babies

And along the way, obstacles and pathways were put in front of them and “fate” asked them to pick which way they wanted go. 

Sometimes the path that is selected has way more trees, bugs, potholes, sinkholes, and mosquito bites than what they expected. 

They learn from it (hopefully) and say, “I will pick a better path next time.”

Sometimes it doesn’t map out as being better. Sometimes they go down the same hard route. Sometimes life pushes them down the stairs and says,

“Now get up bitch” 

It can get aggressive 

Along the way, this individual or two become your parents. Become your guardian. They try their best to make the best decision for your life and theirs. They may or may not learn from their previous mistakes.

They may not turn their life around for the better when they welcome you into this world. 

This leaves you with scars. Scares so deep that the pain is insufferable, and you go into a dark place. Self-numbing. Running away. Erratic behavior. Onsets a change in your brain where you now have to take medicine to feel whatever normal is to you. 

Now you are an adult. You start to learn things about your family. Hidden secrets. You learn things about your parents you weren’t privy to as a child- for good reason. 

This new information may change your perspective on your childhood, on your parents, siblings, and family. 

The question I have for you is… now what? 

Your life is now in your hands. 

You’re at an age where blaming your parents for everything no longer explains your behavior. 

You are in control of your life. 

What are you going to do today? The present. 

You can’t change the past.

You can choose to handle the pain of the past differently. 

You can choose to separate yourself from your family. 

You can come and go as your heart desires. Being around them as you please. 

Or you can remove yourself entirely. 

But this still leaves the question, what are you going to do about you? 

Do you choose to sit in the pain of it all forever, or deal with it head-on?

The information you learned- no matter if it has helped you make sense of everything…

It’s now time to take care of YOU!

To put yourself first. 

Take care of the “little you” inside of you. 

It’s gonna be uncomfortable in the beginning. Choosing you is stepping out of the conformity that was taught to you. Taught you to please others. For you to become something you are not. 

Will you choose to swim or sink?

Will you choose to swim or sink?

The choice is yours.

It’s been yours all along. 

-Sabryn 

See you tomorrow, mwah